The House of Justice was saddened to learn about the difficulties you are experiencing in your marriage. It is indeed disheartening to have someone you love become disenchanted with the Faith which you hold so dear. In these circumstances you are advised to consult with your wife to try to establish guidelines that will promote mutual respect for the other’s beliefs and ideas, and come to some agreement so that the attitudes and behaviour of each one will not impinge on the other’s rights to differing opinions. The marital relationship should not be burdened by one partner’s undue expectations in regard to the other, based on beliefs and desires which that other partner does not share. Although sharing of faith is naturally desirable, it sometimes does not occur, and in such circumstances, even greater care and understanding are required to maintain a healthy marriage relationship.
To resign from the Cause would be a dissimulation of faith since you still believe in Bahá’u’lláh; therefore it could have no positive effect on your marriage. To make a compromise of such magnitude would be morally wrong, and rob you not only of your self-respect but also the ultimate respect of your wife. You are strongly urged not to allow her present antagonism to erode your own beliefs nor to lead to an adversarial position toward her. It should still be quite possible for you to maintain a loving and caring relationship with your wife while always keeping intact the integrity of your own belief and your relationship with Bahá’u’lláh. As you rely on prayer and the study of the Holy Writings, you will grow in strength and become better equipped to handle any criticism which may be leveled against you or the Faith.
- The Universal House of Justice (From a letter dated 1 January 1993 written on behalf of the Universal House of Justice to an individual believer; compilation: ‘To Set the World in Order: Building and Preserving Strong Marriages’, prepared by the Research Department of the Universal House of Justice, August 2023)
