The Tablet of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá … which you refer to in the first paragraph of your letter is only an exhortation, not an injunction. [1] Moreover, it was revealed in honour of some Bahá’í women in Iran who must have written to ‘Abdu’l-Bahá seeking guidance with regard to a specific situation. Unfortunately, the circumstances attending the revelation of the Tablet are not known, because the incoming letter or request has not come to light. The quotation should, therefore, be regarded as an exhortation which was revealed to address a specific situation. This quotation, like many others, has been included in the compilation to provide the friends with the available Writings on different aspects of family life.
The translation has been checked, and there is no doubt that the text given in English is correct.
As you say, the principle of the equality of men and women is unequivocal. The Writings on the subject are clear and unambiguous. The House of Justice has specified time and again that there are times when the husband and the wife should defer to the wishes of the other. Exactly under what circumstances such deference should take place, is a matter for each couple to determine. If, God forbid, they fail to agree, and their disagreement leads to estrangement, they should seek counsel from those they trust and in whose sincerity and sound judgement they have confidence, in order to preserve and strengthen their ties as a united family.
It is the hope of the House of Justice that the above explanation will help in alleviating your perplexities with regard to the rights of the husband and the wife in a family. However, you may wish to refer to the recently released compilation on women for further insights.
- The Universal House of Justice (From a letter dated 2 October 1986 written on
behalf of the Universal House of Justice to an individual believer;
compilation: ‘Family Life’, prepared by the Research Department of the
Universal House of Justice, revised March 2008)
[1] The believer enquired about the reference to the statement concerning a wife’s “obedience to and consideration for her husband” in the text of the following Tablet revealed by ‘Abdu’l-Bahá:
O Handmaids of the All-Sufficing God!
Exert yourselves, that haply ye may be enabled to acquire such virtues as shall honour and distinguish you amongst all women. Of a surety, there is no greater pride and glory for a woman than to be a handmaid in God’s Court of Grandeur; and the qualities that shall merit her this station are an alert and wakeful heart; a firm conviction of the unity of God, the Peerless; a heartfelt love for all His maidservants; spotless purity and chastity; obedience to and consideration for her husband; attention to the education and nurturing of her children; composure, calmness, dignity and self-possession; diligence in praising God, and worshipping Him both night and day; constancy and firmness in His holy Covenant; and the utmost ardour, enthusiasm, and attachment to His Cause. I pray God that each and every one of these bestowals may be conferred upon you.
